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Dee-war: What is it good
for?
After announcing about fifteen different release dates (something all Pakistani
bands love to do – one date is just not enough) Junoon finally managed to
release their seventh all new studio album Deewar (tenth if you count those
money making schemes like Millennium and Daur-e-Junoon). The album has twelve
tracks in total and is, fortunately AND unfortunately, very different from
anything Junoon has put out in the past. Fortunately because one more album like
Ishq and Junoon would be charged with noise pollution. Unfortunately because…
well, read on.
Fans at the official Junoon forum claim the album to be one of Junoon’s best
works audaciously comparing it to U2’s POP. Statements like this actually throw
me into fits of laughter making it very hard to make a complete recovery. The
album is quite experimental much like U2’s POP but the difference is that after
listening to POP I didn’t have the urge to punch someone like I did after
listening to Deewar. And that too not in a nice way. The sheer pain of listening
to this pap can only be compared to the sick feeling one gets after watching
Gigli in its entirety in a single sitting.
Samples from the album popped up on the fan site MyJunoon.com in early May and
immediately one could tell things weren’t looking too good for the self
proclaimed “pioneers of rock music in Pakistan.” I was under the impression that
Junoon couldn’t possibly outdo Jhoolay Lal and Maza Zindagi Ka (aka buy Coca
Cola, please, pretty please, with cherry on top) in the bad music stakes but
Deewar outdoes even these gems and is chockfull of surprises. Without wasting
any more time, I present to you the Official Bandbaja List of Surprises that
Appear on Deewar:
- Brian O’ Connell (perhaps Junoon’s strongest link) has been replaced by a
“bass sequencer” named Faizi. I don’t blame Brian for refusing to play until
Salman decides to do something about those maroon leather pants. Quite honestly,
I would do the same.
- Junoon has moved back to sequenced drums also done by this Faizi fellow
- The Sal-Well truly doth run dry. Ali’s compositions can kick Salman’s
compositions’ ass any day.
- Junoon is not paying Sabir Zafar enough dough for the lyrics anymore.
- There really is a God because No More does not appear on the album. Maybe it
has been held over for their Angraizi album.
- But the God is angry at us hence Khwaab 2003 did make its way on the album and
does serious and irreparable harm to the memorable original. The only thing
worse in the music scene these days than Faraz Anwar on lead vocals hands down
is Salman Ahmed on lead vocals.
What is utterly hilarious is the email Junoon has been sending out to promote
this mistake of an album. They start off with the words “South Asia’s Biggest
Rock Band (CNN)…” – at this point I would like to ask CNN if they have heard of
any other band from South Asia. While I am at it, I would also like to ask where
the heck are those weapons of mass destruction they were yapping on about. And I
also want CNN to admit that they really are sponsored by Duct tape companies.
Then that email goes onto claim that “Junoon break new ground on DEWAAR with the
use of Mirza Ghalib’s poetry on the song Hungama which features Salman singing
lead vocals for the first time!!!!” First of all, were all of those exclamation
marks really necessary? And if I was Junoon, I would do whatever I possibly can
to hide the fact that Salman actually sang on the album. Hungama and Baalma
might (just might) be forgivable by some but Khwaab 2003 should actually be
punishable by law. There have been rumors about Nusrat Hussein wanting to sue
Salman Ahmed for ruining a perfect masterpiece and the rest of Pakistan suing
him for making their ears bleed. Just don’t ask me for the source of these
rumors please.
But fear not my fellow
I-refuse-to-give-up-on-Junoon-just-yet-because-they-released-a-great-album-a-few-albums-go,
all is not dark and gloomy. There are some songs worth praising on Deewar like
Taara Jala which (not surprisingly) is composed by Ali Azmat. Songs like this
make me wonder why Ali is still sticking around with Junoon and most importantly
does he laugh too when he hears Salman sing? The other highlight of the album is
the song Garaj Baras which was also composed by Ali (Salman, are you reading
this?). It is an excellent track with some solid bass and drum sequencing. Ghoom
Tana (the song with the title that suffers from lack of originality) and Deewar,
the title track, aren’t half bad either. Baarish had a lot of potential but
Salman, being the party pooper he is, just had to poop in this party all the way
through with his newly found method of torture: his vocals. Normally, musicians
and singers are paid for their ability to play music or sing but, for the sake
of mankind, Pakistanis should finally show that Jazba-e-Junoon and come together
to pay Salman to stop singing. The man is great with the guitar so why not, for
a myriad of very obvious reasons, let Ali do the singing?
Pappu Yaar, the song that features a stolen riff from Jimi Hendrix’s song Who
Knows, is making its way through music channels these days with the very
colorful sets and even more colorful Junoon. The playful attitude of Junoon in
the video remotely (very remotely) reminds one of Discotheque by U2 and you
can’t help but wonder if Junoon really is trying what U2 tried with POP a few
years ago. If they are, then they have failed. If they are not, they have still
failed. Junoon deserves credit because they tried to experiment on this album
and did manage to sound very different from any of their previous efforts.
Unfortunately they just ended up making some very mediocre music.
I must confess that I lied about No More not being on the album. It really IS on
the album and Salman’s plans of making little children stop listening to
Pakistani music is in full flow. Actually Salman reminds me of the Pied Piper of
Hamelin. What can one do when the man with the guitar (now unfortunately with
the microphone as well) decides to unleash the fury? It was good in the past
though and like all things, this too must come to an end. I am talking about
this article, not Junoon, because apparently they have already come to an end –
a sad one too.
It is always a good idea to leave with a quote filled with wisdom and all that
other gibberish hence I choose the ever so fitting words of Pet Shop Boys: “What
have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?”
Rohail Khan
bandbaja.org
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